Ever been in the position where you felt like you had a successfully run business, but had a difficult time feeling deserving of its rewards?
Jason was right there.
When he first started working with me, it was very clear that the business he had built was very successful. He offered a variety of products and services that were unique in his industry and was able to solve his client’s problems on a consistent basis. Looking at his situation from a bird’s eye view, it would be fair to conclude he was doing pretty well for himself, right?
Guess what, he was! Jason was generating great results for his clients and many times than not, he was over-exceeded them.
——
But you see, he had this one problem. This itty bitty problem called, imposter syndrome. For those of you who aren’t too familiar with this, chances are when I explain it-you’ll nod your head and know all too well what Im talking about here.
Why, you may ask?
Imposter syndrome is known to have its impact on people of all walks of life, but it very well known in the entrepreneur world. This is where high performers, just like you and I work their tails off and despite how much value they bring to the marketplace, they feel like they don't deserve their achievements and therefore work some more in hopes of putting a bandage on their boo boo.
Ha, seriously(I’ve been here myself).
For the most part, when it comes to the average high performing entrepreneur, we are all to a degree “doing the most,” as they say. As in, we are willing to do anything and everything to make our dreams a reality.
.
.
.
Now you may be asking, “well then, if we are doing more than the average business owner, why is it that imposter syndrome is so common among us?”
Simple.
It boils down to this word call deservingness
——
You see, despite how hard someone works and puts in hour after hour of dedication into their craft, their results will most likely be determined by their feelings of deservingness.
It doesn’t matter how hard they work, how talented they may be or how much revenue they can generate. None of that matters. None of that matters if that same person can not see past their once perceived limiting beliefs about themselves and receive what they truly deserve.
Just like Jason, many of us have fallen into this trap before where we felt like, hey we have this great product, we have all the tools and resources to make it happen-but how can we truly get to the other side of that transaction and feel deserving of the money that just hit our bank accounts?
.
.
Q: How can we truly feel like we’ve accomplish anything?
.
.
A: good question. You can’t. You simply can not ever feel you’ve accomplish anything, if you don’t feel like you deserve that accomplishment.
If we breakdown the word deserve down a bit, it means to earn and to reap rewards from some form of action or work that we’ve done, right? Ok so if that’s the case, why do some of the most successful top entrepreneurs just like Jason here, not feeling deserving of all rewards that naturally come from their hard work?
Chances are there is something deep down them, that’s holding them back.
——
(Just like all case studies, I have replaced my client’s real name with another. With his permission, we figured Jason will do for now). Lets doing some deep diving. Shall we?!
Jason grew up in Boston and as the only child, often times he felt like he had to go above and beyond all expectations. He so badly wanted his dad to provide him the support and encouragement that he always desired-but was always afraid to voice.
During his childhood and leading up to his adulthood years, he worked his tail off. He worked a full-time job in all of high school and into his first two years of college, thats until he decided to he needed drop out. Jason came to a stage in his life where he felt that his dreams of being a fitness trainer and business owner were never going to be met in a classroom. He did what anyone in his shoes would do, he continued on with his full-time job and even picked up a part-time job on the weekends to earn some extra cash.
By the time a year or two had passed, he had taken a series of fitness courses where we learned the skills necessary to train others. He began building out his business model and planned out the products and services he felt would bring the most value to his clients.
Month after month, Jason started to gain momentum in his business and he would often times share it with his parents. His mom was always supportive. She would constantly tell him how much she believed in him and did all she could to make sure he felt loved.
His dad on the other hand, didn’t do as much of a great job at that. He was always caught up in his own work and believed that school was the “only” way to leading a successful life. To put it frankly, Jason’s dad was very disappointed when Jason decided to drop out of college after his first two years. His dad was a very successful attorney in their local area and one of his biggest dreams was for his son to follow his footsteps.
…..are we following along here?
——
Despite his dad’s disapproval, Jason continued chasing his passion. He knew that he had it in him to make it happen for himself, but despite every “accomplishment” he encountered, he always felt he had to do even more, simply because it would never be enough for his dad.
He went on anyways. Jason ignored this limiting belief and continued to put in the work necessary to get to where we needed to go. Within his first year, Jason far exceeded his financial goals. He not only built a very successful fitness coaching business, but he took it one step further. Within that same year, Jason purchased his very own gym.
Yes.
His very own gym…at the age of 28.
——
Guess how his mom felt about this accomplishment?
What about his dad?
Now, how do you think he felt about his own accomplishment?
After going out for some celebratory drinks with his friends, Jason went right back to the gym(secretly, without them knowing), to work on some of his new hire paperwork and whatnot.
He shared with me that at one point, he stood up from his desk and looked around. He began walking around his gym. He eventually found himself sitting over at his bench press and started going through the photos in his phone, looking for a photo he had taken of his visions board a few months back.
After some scrolling, he finally found the photo he was looking for.
That’s when it hit him.
Jason realized something, very powerful that night. He was literally standing inside the same exact gym that he had mapped out on his vision board-just months beforehand!!!
Again, lets take this back.
Jason was 28 years old, Yes, 28 years old and after working diligently on his business, he had manifested one of his biggest dreams of all time! How do you think he felt about it though?
——
Yep, you guessed it. Jason didn’t feel deserving of this accomplish, just like he did with every single one leading up to owning a gym. He sat there inside his gym, by himself for hours trying to figure out what is this THING was that he knew was hindering him.
Thoughts started to race his mind:
“I just purchased my dream gym!”
“Why don’t I feel successful and accomplished?!”
“This has always been one my biggest dreams!”
“What is WRONG with me?!”
Was he upset with himself? Ha, just a tad.
——
As time progressed and we started working with one another, Jason began to embrace that there needed to be some deep diving that he had ignored for quite some time. He knew he had to do something about it and ignoring it, was no longer an option for him.
I walked him through one of my intensive self-development programs, where we placed much emphasis on his limiting beliefs around himself(mainly), his dad, his past partners and any other areas that he noticed took a toll as a result of this imposter syndrome that he had been dealing with.
Over the course of the next six months, we began the uncomfortable work.
One fear after another, Jason’s lightbulb started to g
o off.
I’ve included below my free workbook on the four steps you can take today to help you begin your journey in ridding yourself of imposter syndrome.
——
We first began with his deep rooted fears and limiting beliefs surrounding his relationship with himself. We found that the more digging we did, the more Jason realized that he is actually supportive of his goals and aspirations. He knew that deep down, he had it in him to turn any goal into reality. He believed in himself- to that degree.
When I’d ask him, how deserving he felt of x, y, z goal, thats’ when we heard more silence. Eventually, he started to open up and explained how much he’s always wanted to feel important and recognized.
Pssssst: did you catch those two key words?!—-#1 important and #2 recognized
(hold onto that thought)
Jason went on to share how his dad’s approval was all he ever wanted. He felt that just like any other little boy out there, he wanted his dad to feel proud of him. He needed to HEAR it from his dad. He needed to SEE it from his dad. Jason went on to explain how this all started back in grade school. He said that his relationship with his mom was always more than he could ever ask for and shared his immense appreciation.
However he kept referencing his need for his father to be there to support him through his journey manhood. He said that he always believe that a young boy can’t become a man, without their own dad’s approval. That same approval he so longed for, he never received from his father.
So he went on trying to prove his dad wrong. He set out on a mission to drop out of college, follow his goal of being a successful business owner and be able to earn handsomely as a result.
Guess what happened?
Just like the rest of us, life handed Jason a very valuable lesson.
——
Jason soon learned that covering up his deep limiting beliefs around manhood and feeling deserving of what a “successful and strong” man in his eyes earns, soon broke into pieces. He realized that he couldn’t ignore this deep lack inside of himself.
After quite a few coaching calls and deep dives, Jason was able to gain the insight and tools he needed to do two things.
Do the work himself, to feel deserving of all his accomplishments leading up to this very moment.
Use this as an opportunity to seek understanding and repair his relationship with his dad.
As time progressed, Jason soon became a whole new Jason. He kept at it with his ambitions and aspirations. He continuously working on his relationship with his dad. He found more similarities between the two of them, than differences-which only grew their bond even stronger.
—
Being the Jason that he was, do you think he continued on to reach for exceptional results in everything he did within his business?
Heck yes, he did! Not only that, Jason felt a tad bit different this time around though. He felt deserving of what he achieved.
What happened afterwards? Jason’s overall satisfaction in himself AND his production in his business……SKY ROCKETED.
Jason went on to open to his second location just two years later and guess who helped him this time around with the legalities? Yep you guessed it, his dad.
——
There we are. I truly hope Jason’s story helped shine some light on your experiences with imposter syndrome. Use the workbook below to help guide you through this process and remember one thing- you’re a high performing entrepreneur FOR A REASON.
You were built for this. Now lets just make sure you see your full value and feel deserving of all the rewards that will continue to come your way!
——
Until next time my friends, keep your head up and know that whatever “obstacle” that comes your way throughout your business journey, its really just a blessing in disguise.
XO
-Bauer
P.S. Want to stay in the know and join other high performing entrepreneurs?! Be sure to subscribe to our monthly newsletter here with up to date blogs, exclusive freebies and more!
Comments